Q. We thought we’d enjoy having our dog sleep in the bed with us, and we were fine with it when he was a puppy. But he is just too big now to share the mattress, and we find ourselves losing too much sleep trying to accommodate his need to stretch out. We hate the thought of banishing him. Is there any way we can do this gradually — starting with one night in the bed, one night out, and then moving more and more toward having him sleep on the floor once and for all?
Craig Joyce
St. Louis, Missouri
Dear Mr. Joyce,
A. Your thinking is loving, but your solution won’t work. The only way for your dog to understand that the bed is off limits is to go cold turkey. If you do one night on the bed, one night off, he’ll just think you’re being weird and inconsistent —and will keep you awake trying to climb on board because he knows that works sometimes.
Don’t think of it as banishment. Do allow your dog to remain in the room with you, and let him know that he’s special by giving him either a plush dog bed with one of two of his favorite toys or a crate (with the door unlocked) that has a soft cushion. If a delicious treat helps adjust him to his new sleeping quarters, that’s fine.
It should take about three nights for your dog to understand that bedtime is different now. He may need reassurance from you in the night as you adjust him to the new routine. But look at it this way: making sure you get a better night’s sleep will give you more energy to play with him during the day.